For a few days we lived in hope and anticipation. We relished in the fact that there were 3 embryos living inside me. We laughed and joked and dreamed. We forgot our troubles for a time and just...WERE.
The day after the transfer we drove into Smoky Mountain National Park. It was so incredible! There was just so much texture everywhere, and the blueish "smoky" hue of the higher hills is magical. There were giant icicles hanging of the sides of the rocks, yet it was still fairly warm and there were even plenty of orange and yellow leaves on some trees.
We pulled over and climbed around on some of the rocks by the rapid moving water, we took pictures and laughed and dreamed. We told the embies that this was a memory we would always cherish and we dreamed of coming back to this spot someday with children who could play and hike with us.
It wasn't a time of fear or worry. It was a perfect utopia of peace and blessing. We just didn't need to dwell on the fact that the future could hold different plans than we would want. I am always going to remember these joyful parts of our journey. There are enough tears and anger and frustrations to fill a grain bin up on a farm, but there are these gems. Gems of sparkling, radiant joy and nothing can take those away from our hearts.